2012 Why do I walk with Desteni?
What made me listen to Desteni was of course first of all the message, but also the bluntness, directness and rawness with which it was delivered – nothing veiled with “beautiful” paraphrases, but the UNDENIABLE reality as it is. And the cardinal point was that Desteni actually provided me with practical common sense solutions to both the internal fuckedness and its external counterpart and reflection as this whole world. Desteni provided me with tools with which I could face myself instead of suppressing what I had become with meditation and “light” and “love”. I had finally access to tools that enabled me to investigate myself and stop myself from existing as a clone of my parents and a slave to my programming. Tools with which I could release myself from the bondage and chains of my past and this conditioned automatisms and transcend all mental creations to become actually self-willed and self-directive. It wasn’t about “personal growth” in the normal sense, “evolving” or adding even more to the fuckedness but rather devolving, peeling off and deprogramming.
In late 2007 I had since a year been caught up in spirituality and was at this point quite frustrated with that nothing was actually changing. The “lingo” within the spiritual community was always covered in the sweetest honey and all that was required to be accepted within the spiritual community was to regurgitate a bunch of empty paraphrases – “namaste dear brother of light” – and if you brought in any “negativity” – such as talking about war, rape, starvation – you would be ostracized by the community. This seemed very “off” to me from the very beginning, but I was far too addicted to the positive feelings I “gained” from my participation with spirituality and new age to put down my foot and say “enough!” so to speak. So I continued to bury my head in the sand until Desteni swept the comfy rug from under my feet with words that I just couldn’t possibly deny or resist. Finding Desteni thus saved me from digging my head deeper into this spiritual mind fuck and pretty quickly I started to see what I was participating in – namely that I was desperately trying to flee from myself and my self-responsibility by creating a spiritual universe where I could justify everything with there being some “higher purpose” for it all – completely disregarding myself as a creator through my acceptances and allowances and disregarding the one and only thing that allowed me to live in “bliss” and “happiness” – MONEY.
Within the raw and unfiltered uncovering of reality as it really is I realized that Desteni wasn’t here to make me feel happy and blissful or good about myself – they weren’t aiming to please me or tell me what I wanted to hear – which furthermore made me realize the absolute credibility of Desteni.
Light, love and bliss was certainly the path of least resistance, but at what cost? If I would have stayed within spirituality I would have continued to justify the abuse with “karma” and “purpose” and I would have continued to pump money into the spiritual industry without ever question myself or the state of this world. As destonians we refrain from sugar coating things, we are brutally and head-on exposing the layers of lies that we have deliberately accepted and allowed both collectively as humanity and individually as the “natural state”. With Self-Honesty and Self-Forgiveness I have been able to investigate specifically how I have created the personality which I used to believe was ‘who I am’ and believed was ‘set in stone’, and deprogram myself from that which hinders and limits me from being Here within and as the physical, all that which separates me from the physical, all that which hinders me to stand up and do what is best for all.
Since walking with Desteni for almost 4 years and having applied the tools I have for instance been able to stop Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, alcohol- and pornography addiction – and push myself beyond my perceived limits just to realize that they’re not real. And I continue to dis-cover who I really am as Life and re-write myself and push myself to walk myself into a trustworthy human being that honors Life.
The validity and the proof of the effectiveness of the tools is right here, shared and researched within thousands of blogs and vlogs by Destonians - and for me the proof is within how I personally have changed and been able to effectively push through perceived limitations of the mind. But by all means prove it to yourself – don’t take my word for it. Self-honesty and self-forgiveness will cost you zero cents and is the greatest gift you can ever give yourself.